By Raymond Tran
Copy Editor
Dear Santa,
I’m not going to lie, this year has been tough. For Christmas, I would like my motivation back since I lost mine a couple of months ago. I would also enjoy a 4.0 GPA and a college recommendation letter from both Barack and Michelle Obama as well as a 1650 on the SAT. I know that you’re really busy during this time of the year, maybe you could just send me a couple million dollars if my list has proven to be too difficult.
While I still have your attention, I would also like to file a complaint about how you are treating your elves. Sweatshop labor is never okay. I don’t even know why they haven’t planned a rebellion yet, but this behavior needs to change Mister Claus.
I would continue this letter, but, as previously stated, my motivation has left me.
Thank you for your time,
Raymond Tran
