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The Tongva Times

The Tongva Times

The Tongva Times

How to survive the zombie apocalypse

    By Kaylin Tran

    World editor

    Shows and video games such as “The Walking Dead” or “The Last of Us” feature an apocalyptic world in which a disease takes over the human population and turns people into mindless cannibals. Despite this fantasy only existing in fictional storylines, it is not something to take lightly. So, with the idea of humanity’s impending doom in mind, here are some tips for surviving the zombie apocalypse.

    Tip #1: Suit up. Zombies are known to be relentless when it comes to devouring our flesh and brains. A recommended option is to invest in a full body Ebola suit. This will ensure complete safety while making the ultimate fashion statement with its bright yellow hue and turquoise gloves. Forget efficiency and comfort! There is never an excuse to not look stylish.

    Tip #2: Stock up with an arsenal of weapons. The world will become cutthroat, and it goes without saying that being able to protect oneself against both zombies and other survivors is an absolute must. If frightened at the prospect of holding a gun, remember that anything can be used as a weapon if needed.

    Tip #3: Keep a kit of supplies. Anything can happen in a situation like this, so fill a backpack to the brim with supplies to get by. Many sources say to pack canned food, water, and basic survival equipment, but these items are trivial to what one really need. Be sure to bring board games, books, or something entertaining to do during any free time. Keep in mind, outrunning zombies does not take as long as one might imagine. Read an encyclopedia, do a jigsaw puzzle, learn how to play the guitar. The possibilities are endless.

    Tip #4: Build a fortress. Once an outbreak occurs, everyone’s initial thought is to get out of there, which results in backed up freeways and streets, or in other words, free food for zombies. Instead, stay put and fortify the place by digging a moat around it, complete with the drawbridge around the entire perimeter – but keep in mind to be tasteful and practical. Nothing says zombies are not welcome like a white picket fence and some barbed wire.

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